Are you with a toxic person? If you are constantly pressured by someone to the point of stressing out, and your conversations with them are draining and complicated, you might be dealing with a toxic person. Let us see if that person fits the following descriptions, and hopefully, you will be able to navigate this challenging relationship.
- A toxic person is manipulative. This person may use their authority or dominance to pressure you to do what they want. No matter what your circumstance is, there are no excuses. It is all about what they are. Do not expect equality from this toxic person.
- A toxic person is judgmental. You don’t want to disappoint this toxic person. If you do, or you made a mistake, they are quick to judge and will criticize you as a person rather than the act. No matter how sorry you are, they will overreact as though you have done a grave thing to deserve such a spat.
- A toxic person takes no responsibility for his/her own feelings. A toxic person will always tell you their perspective. Do not attempt to tell your objective view about the other party because they will react and take it against you. You may have the best intention of making them feel better, but it might not work. A toxic person will project their feelings and blame others for what they think rather than doing something in their circle of influence.
- A toxic person doesn’t apologize. A toxic person claims to be the victim of circumstances unfavorable to them. If you disappoint them, they will make you feel guilty. If they are at fault, they will not apologize, and they will not process it with you. After a while, they will act around you as if nothing happened when they have gotten over their anger. You think that would be the right time to confront them about their actions, but no. They will take this against you. They expect you to get over the feeling of hurt by yourself.
- A toxic person is inconsistent. A toxic person can be very moody. One minute they are okay, and the next minute they are not. They are also very irritable with some things you do, but when they do the same thing, and you get irritated in the process, they will react profusely. They like and dislike certain things but do not live by their expectations.
- A toxic person will make you prove yourself to them. A toxic person will make you feel inadequate. They will reiterate the favors they did for you and ask you what you did for them. They will also judge you unfairly to the point of defending yourself. They will also tell you that if you care about them, you will not forget about this and that and will put them above everything else.
- A toxic person will make you defend yourself at all times. A toxic person diverts your attention to the faults you did in the past whenever you make a mistake. They will also gaslight, and you wish you have recorded what you did to prove your point. But no matter what, they will never consider that. They will still stand by their opinion about you because of what you did.
- A toxic person is not caring, supportive, or interested in what’s important to you. A toxic person is not as excited as you are when it comes to your achievements or curious when it comes to your stories. But they expect you to be that when it comes to their affairs. They will also seek your attention when you are busy with your own affairs by acting out. A toxic person may also misinterpret your efforts in your dealings and point out that you don’t display the same enthusiasm when it comes to them.
Toxic people can be a burden to people who would want to pursue a relationship with them. When confronted with issues, they tend to blame others, and at the same time, they want others to feel sorry for them. Their reactions are often uncalled for, and how they view unfavorable situations is way too much that it can cause emotional turmoil for both parties. On your end, no matter how much you fix or save them, it does not really work for them.
A life with toxic people is draining and emotionally exhausting. However, if you do want to stay in a relationship with toxic people, you will need to learn how to sort out the things that you should deal with and something that you will have to ignore. This means you need to shift your focus on not getting too attached or taking their negativity personally. You may feel obliged or even responsible to care for and understand them; however, loving yourself should also be your priority. Do not allow yourself to get sucked dry while you continue to give everything you have to help him change. Your time and energy should also be devoted to other things and people.
Another word of caution. Narcissistic, toxic people are overly jealous and attention seekers. They have tendencies to invade your privacy and take things that they uncover against you. Selfish people also think they are always right and you are wrong. And because you feel for them, you tend to be submissive to the point of abuse. They will also limit your interactions with other people because they want you to center your focus on them.
Relationships are complicated and complex at times. Choosing to be with a toxic person may not be the ideal thing to do but again, examine why you have chosen to engage with them. If you are already being demoralized by their lack of empathy and thinking less about yourself, that is a sign that you must flee from the relationship.
