Help! My Husband Resents That I Have the Summer Off


With the summer in full swing, many people find themselves enjoying some much-deserved time off. Whether it is the result of a planned vacation, an educator’s break, or simply taking advantage of less demanding work schedules, having a chance to unwind can be incredibly refreshing and rejuvenating. However, what happens when your partner doesn’t share in this joy and begins to harbor feelings of resentment? If you find yourself in a situation where your husband is envious or bitter about your summer break, here are some steps you may want to consider taking.

1. Communicate frequently and openly:

The foundation of any strong relationship is open and honest communication. Make sure you are discussing how and why your time off affects both of you. Try to understand his perspective and the reasons behind his resentment. This will not only create a comfortable environment for sharing feelings but will also help uncover underlying issues that may be easier to address.

2. Put yourselves in each other’s shoes:

It’s essential to understand why your husband might feel resentful about your summer off. He could be feeling burdened with extra responsibilities or simply feel left out of your newfound relaxation. Take some time together to walk in each other’s shoes and see both sides clearly.

3. Be empathetic:

Your partner may be going through a hard time at work, struggling with personal issues, or dealing with the pressures of family dynamics during your time off. Empathy and understanding can help lessen feelings of resentment by ensuring a shared sense of support among partners.

4. Share your free time:

Make an effort to include your husband in activities during your time off, either by planning joint outings or overlapping vacations if possible. By carving out shared experiences that balance work-life priorities for both partners, resentments can often be suppressed.

5. Set expectations and boundaries:

Recognize that having contrasting schedules and responsibilities may lead to the occasional disagreement. To alleviate potential friction, establish clear expectations and mutually agreed-upon boundaries around your time off and his working hours. This can help avoid miscommunications and resentment.

6. Encourage self-care for your partner:

Support your husband in finding ways to care for his physical and mental well-being, even as he continues to work during your time off. Whether it’s exercising, engaging in a hobby, or taking a day off occasionally, help him find what works best for him.

7. Seek professional help if needed:

If the two of you are unable to resolve issues of resentment on your own, consider reaching out to a professional counselor who can provide guidance on navigating these complex emotions in a healthy manner.


Navigating feelings of resentment within a relationship can be challenging but is not insurmountable. By communicating openly, sharing experiences, understanding each other’s concerns, and setting healthy boundaries, it is possible to work through these difficulties and enjoy the growth that comes from confronting and overcoming relationship challenges together.

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