A frustrated mom has taken to social media to urge parents to stop telling their children that bullies “like” them when they’re being targeted. This misguided approach, she argues, not only normalizes bullying but also prevents children from seeking help and understanding the true nature of the problem.
“It’s so harmful to tell children that bullies ‘like’ them,” she wrote in a viral post. “It trivializes the experience, making it seem like a harmless joke or even a compliment.”
This mother’s plea resonates with countless parents who have witnessed the devastating effects of bullying firsthand. The “like” theory, while well-intentioned, often stems from a desire to comfort a child in distress. However, it fails to address the underlying issue of power imbalance and aggression.
By implying that bullying is a form of attention-seeking behavior, this approach can inadvertently:
Normalize bullying: It makes the behavior seem acceptable, hindering children from understanding its harmful nature.
Blame the victim: It puts the onus on the child being bullied, suggesting they are somehow responsible for the aggressor’s actions.
Prevent intervention: It discourages children from seeking support, as they might believe it’s just a “phase” or a sign of “liking.”
Instead of resorting to this unhelpful narrative, parents should:
Educate children about bullying: Explain the difference between playful teasing and harmful behavior.
Validate their feelings: Acknowledge the emotional distress caused by bullying and offer support.
Encourage them to seek help: Help children identify trusted adults and resources they can reach out to.
Address the bullying directly: Communicate with the bully’s parents and school authorities to address the issue.
By taking a proactive and empathetic approach, parents can empower their children to overcome bullying and build resilience, ensuring a safe and supportive environment for all.
